How can I make my daughter happy?
My daughter of 34 years old came back to our house to live with me and my husband. Her marriage didn’t work and she is stuck in an ugly divorce. On top of that she got laid off in a nasty way. Physically, she is not feeling well and maybe in some sort of a depression. I don’t blame her, she got a lot to work through.
I was happy to have her back. However, over a period of 2 months or so, this odd thing happened. I started behaving like a mom taking care of her child and she willingly complied into the little girl role. Only she is 34 years old and not a 5 year old child!
To illustrate how the situation is; my day starts with fixing her breakfast, then waking her up. I wash her clothes, cook for her and make sure I prepare her favorite meals. If I am not considerate enough to get her what she wants, she doesn’t want to eat, just when she was a little girl. And I worry if she gets all the nutrients she needs.
I am totally upset when she gives these signs that she is not happy and things are not going well for her. This wears me out and I just don’t understand why I am doing this. Is it that Im trying to compensate for not being a good mother in the past? Am I feeling guilty of not being the perfect mother? I just want her to be happy and do well, but I don’t seem to be able to make it happen for her. I know she is responsible for her own life, but still it feels as if it is my fault too.
I know it has to do with me, and its driving me crazy.